Henri Nouwen wrote some interesting words on Community that helped me to realize why my expectations of Community were never met. My expectations were faulty - they were never meant to be realized. It is better that they were never met. It made me dig deeper inside myself - where the solution lay waiting to be found.
"Solitude greeting solitude, that's what community is all about. Community is not the place where we are no longer alone but the place where we respect, protect, and reverently greet one another's aloneness. When we allow our aloneness to lead us into solitude, our solitude will enable us to rejoice in the solitude of others. Our solitude roots us in our own hearts. Instead of making us yearn for company that will offer us immediate satisfaction, solitude makes us claim our center and empowers us to call others to claim theirs. Our various solitudes are like strong straight pillars that hold up the roof of our communal house. Thus, solitude always strengthens community."
Excerpt from "Bread For The Journey".
Monday, May 19, 2008
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Living Life Abundantly
Today was a beautiful day for me.
I found myself facing the world with a heart that was open and receptive. It has been a long time since I felt capable of doing that to the degree that I did today. And I enjoyed myself immensely.
We are called to keep that inner spark alive as we step out in faith - trusting that we will be given the inner resources to handle whatever life puts in our path.
It felt good to finally be able to do that once again.
I found myself facing the world with a heart that was open and receptive. It has been a long time since I felt capable of doing that to the degree that I did today. And I enjoyed myself immensely.
We are called to keep that inner spark alive as we step out in faith - trusting that we will be given the inner resources to handle whatever life puts in our path.
It felt good to finally be able to do that once again.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Designer Lives
When we were in town today, we saw one of those "bumblebee yellow" bronco-type vehicles. I said to my granddaughter, "If I were young, beautiful, and rich, I would buy one of those cars." But I know that I wouldn't have. Even if I was young, beautiful, and rich. Those vehicles just don't fit who I am; or ever was. They stand out so much from other vehicles that I think you would have to be pretty comfortable with yourself to drive one. Maybe that is why I am always so fascinated with those vehicles; and with the people who drive them.
If I was young and naive once again - not realizing that you have to work with what you have inside you, I may have tried to change myself to fit the car - but I doubt it.
It was always those inner qualities that I wanted bad enough to try to force myself into believing they were a part of me before I actually had the chance to grow into them.
I didn't realize that, for most of us, those qualities come only with age and lots of painful lessons. It's not like going to Sears and choosing this one, that one, and another one to go with it.
It takes a long time, a lot of effort, and a willingness to be patient. A lot of waiting goes into birthing any quality worth having - and there is a price to be paid each step of the way - a sacrifice that has to be made. It is not as easy as fishing a few coins out of our pocket and being done with it.
Now I am content to be who I am. It feels good to finally be at peace with the face I see in the mirror. I don't want to make any more sacrifices in hopes of becoming a better person. For today, I am choosing to keep what little I have left and leave the designing to braver or more foolhardy souls.
If I was young and naive once again - not realizing that you have to work with what you have inside you, I may have tried to change myself to fit the car - but I doubt it.
It was always those inner qualities that I wanted bad enough to try to force myself into believing they were a part of me before I actually had the chance to grow into them.
I didn't realize that, for most of us, those qualities come only with age and lots of painful lessons. It's not like going to Sears and choosing this one, that one, and another one to go with it.
It takes a long time, a lot of effort, and a willingness to be patient. A lot of waiting goes into birthing any quality worth having - and there is a price to be paid each step of the way - a sacrifice that has to be made. It is not as easy as fishing a few coins out of our pocket and being done with it.
Now I am content to be who I am. It feels good to finally be at peace with the face I see in the mirror. I don't want to make any more sacrifices in hopes of becoming a better person. For today, I am choosing to keep what little I have left and leave the designing to braver or more foolhardy souls.
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