Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Betrayal

I don't think it is my brother's death that caused me so much grief; as the way he died.

By the time you are sixty, you have accepted death as a part of life - even though it is never easy for anyone involved.

My brother put so much trust in his doctors that he believed right to the very end that he was going to get better. He tolerated the tortuous treatment they were prescribing because he thought it meant he could go home and have a few more years with his family.

I believe those very doctors he put his faith in knew from the outset that he didn't stand a chance of recovery from the leukemia. And with one kidney recently removed, he stood very little chance of surviving the chemotherapy.

It would have been so much better all the way around if they had levelled with him. They have plenty of medication that can keep you relatively pain-free while you live out the remainder of your life with the comfort of your family.

It was the same when my husband died seven years ago. As soon as the cancer was diagnosed, he was sent to a cancer specialist who said they would start chemotherapy right away. We took it for granted this meant my husband's cancer was treatable.

The chemo caused my husband to vomit continuously to the day he died - even after the treatments were aborted because they were not helping. A month after the treatments were started, I was shown a letter this same specialist wrote to our family doctor stating, "I don't expect this to do any good, but we will give chemo a try."

My husband had a right to that information so he could make an informed decision. He may still have gone with the chemo - but at least it would have been His decision.

If we hire a lawyer for legal purposes, we expect that he will give us ALL the infomation and help us to make an informed decision. We should be able to expect the same from our medical profession.

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