A year after my niece came to live with me, she told me that I have a strong voice. I knew she was referring to that forceful tone of voice that I sometimes use with her - the one I've used on myself my whole life. It doesn't get me anywhere with either one of us. And it leaves me feeling bad about myself.
How much better is the voice that is strong in its gentleness, in its love. How much more effective it is in changing those behaviors we are trying to change in one's self or in another.
How much better I feel about myself when I am able to use it.
As I observe myself without judgment, I notice that it is the wounds from my own childhood that get in my way sometimes of reacting from a heart of love. Now I just forgive myself and move on. It's over sooner than when I stop to beat myself up.
And children are so forgiving - another lesson we would do well to learn from them.
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