I was young when my first husband died. Nobody in my world had died before.
Many people came to the funeral parlor - not knowing what to say - they offered whatever words of comfort they could come up with, which only served to increase my pain. Then a man I didn't know came in - probably someone my husband knew from work or AA. He didn't say a word to me - just put his right hand on my right shoulder and left it there for a moment - then he moved on.
I can not tell you the DEEP comfort I got from this gesture - and not just for that moment. Whenever I felt overwhelmed with grief over the next months, I relived the feeling of having that Comforting hand on my shoulder, and it brought me peace and strength.
Well, today I had that feeling again. I was reading a friend's post(howlsatmoon.blogspot.com)
and he ended his post by saying, "I've got your back covered". I got that comforting feeling in the middle of my back - like a FRIEND had it covered - someone I knew could be counted on to honor the words they spoke. It gave me the courage I needed to move on and do the things I have to do now.
Words or gestures that reach you at that "Subtle Body" level stay with you, and you are able to call them back up again whenever you need them, because they have been incorporated into your Being.
I have already started walking some new paths - it gets a little scary sometimes because this requires that I even set aside outdated ways of thinking - old familiar ways. It requires that I trust the process - step out of my comfort zone. It also requires that I use a new set of tools in place of the crutch (food) I have used to get me this far.
I now realize a need for moving slowly in this new direction - a need for being gentle with myself - two things I'm not used to giving myself permission to do. Taking too big a step at one time has repercussions that interfere with the process. Baby steps sometimes get you farther - quicker.
I am realizing something else. We have to find the courage to start off in new directions on our own, but it is never a road that we walk alone. Along the way, we find other people walking the same road, taking the same journey. Shared insights create new memories and people you would never have chanced to meet become treasured friends.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
PWW, this path we're on isn't treacherous, you simply have to trust your guide.
Surely the heights can be dizzying.
Sit down and enjoy the View!
Who is your guide, and how do you know you can trust?
Listen closely, dear Rose, listen.
Can you hear it?
The voice is emanating from.....you.
If you can't trust yourself, why'd you start the journey? What's it saying now?
"let's go, Rose, we need to move on ahead and see what's around the bend"
You can rest again there.
Wollf
Hmmmm.....i feel a train of thought, nonrhyming, semisensical poem coming on.
Do you know "crys alone"? She lives up near you.....she could use your strength.
More on that later....I have a poem to spew. Besides, it's the height of Tootsie Roll season
Once again, Wollf, you are so right. How did you become so wise?
Especially about those heights - they can be dizzying - always been afraid of them myself - I hate to fall - it hurts my pride - which I have always had a little too much of. It gets in the way sometimes.
And what about those valleys - they can be awful low sometimes - gotta watch out for them, too.
And then there's the Trolls - who don't always come dressed as Trolls. Cougars can be so naive - that's why they prefer to travel alone - only letting in a trusted few.
If I can be of any help to "crys alone" - willing to give it my best shot....
Once again, thanks for the chance to dialogue - as usual, it has been a pleasure.
Post a Comment